Breaking News: Disastrous Show and Tell day at Tolarian Elementary School
The recent show and tell day at Tolarian Elementary school was anything but normal. Which is to be expected from a school that teaches magic. But this time it ended with absolutely disastrous results. Half of the building is now missing, and there is a large extra planar warp right in the middle of the parking lot. Little Timmy, the child partially responsible for the grandeur display, claims that he “Didn’t see it comin'”, just thought his “pet” would get lonely in it’s dark home. We must stress enough, if you are going to allow your child to go to show and tell day, please for the sake of the planes, do not let them bring extra dimensional beasts to the school, those must strictly stay in designated extra dimensional parks. Gladly no children or staff went missing or were injured, however the vice principal’s beloved and incredibly rare lotus petal collection went miraculously missing. Official’s say that it has likely been stolen by someone in all of the confusion. Police have now blockaded the scene and request that no citizen go anywhere near the school. In fact don’t even look at it. Actually for the time being it is recommended to just completely forget the school even exists. There is no elementary school. Please continue on with your daily lives while our local officials work on cleaning up everything.
We were granted the opportunity to interview Spike – a local student who is trying to make big – who claims this experience has deeply shaken his ability to continue his studies. All he wanted to do was show everyone his Tarmogoyf, which he proudly raised from an egg he received for his birthday last year. But his plans were certainly cut short after Timmy’s turn came by.
“It was like a giant spaghetti monster!” He said. “I couldn’t believe what I saw, it was so crazy! It ate the school! I haven’t seen goyfy either… Wait where’s goyfy? Goyfy!??” We had to cut the interview short because he started shivering and rocking back and forth – repeating the same words over and over again. “The eldra mother will be victorious… The eldra mother will be victorious…”
We don’t exactly know what that means… But hey kids are kids right? Probably just some trauma, nothing our in house therapist can’t help with.
Some of the other things students were seen to have brought to the event were, Umezawa’s very own Jitte, a Frenzied Goblin, a Book from a Sylvan Library, and a partially tamed Phyrexian. It seems like it would’ve been quite the fun and educational time if it hadn’t of been for it’s untimely closure.
Here is word straight from Timmy about what happened:
“I just wanted E to have some new friends. I didn’t know she was gonna eat half the school. I guess she was kinda hungry though…” He continued to explain how he was very sorry that there is now an extra dimensional rift in the schools parking lot, and that “E” would be in a long timeout for her misbehavior. Additionally Timmy was asked to publicly apologize on behalf of the entire school for causing a national panic.
For now all seems to be alright, however the magic council is looking into the implications of elementary show and tell days. It’s looking like this might be the last one for a while, as the council is considering putting a stop to them after this incident and last year’s “vampire scare”. Which apparently we still haven’t actually caught yet… But anyways, once again, just remain entirely away from the school until our local officials say it is okay to go near it again. Stay safe, and don’t wander around the city at night.
As always, have a wonderful magic filled day fellow readers.
In other news, some other things students brought to the talent show have not been discovered yet. Among such items are Spike’s Tarmogoyf, a rouge elf, the vampire from last year, and some kind of artifact named Batterskull. If you happen across any of these items by all means please return them to our stations lost and found service and we’ll be sure they get to their proper owners, thanks!
Show and tell can be a very fun and dangerous time for everyone involved. Especially if people start bringing really crazy things to show off. While what was discussed above was just a mere elementary school, it serves as a perfect example of the disastrous effects that such a simple concept can have. Some mage’s have even gotten the show and tell craze, and have begun incorporating it into their practices. They’ve taken on the goal of giving everyone an equal opportunity to show off what they have, but generally these “Show and Tell” mages have some pretty dangerous stuff to show off. Either way, just be careful the next time some sort of organized show and tell is planned near you, you never know what someone might bring to show off.
Thanks for reading! Sylvan Stories is a weekly series, so be sure to check back in a week for the next addition. If you have any questions, comments, or concerns, feel free to leave them in the section below.
And, as always, happy gaming!